One of the hardest things one faces when one has left one’s country of birth and settled in another far-away land, is that one is unable to support those left behind in times of need. The world is so accessible now and this has led to fragmented families as more of us choose to pursue our lives elsewhere. There are so many parents and grandparents who have to conduct their relationships and witness their grandchildren growing up via Skype or FaceTime. How many little kids think that their granny and grandpa live in their mom’s IPad? Its a sad fact of life but however much we bemoan and slate social media, we are also greatly appreciative and grateful that it provides such a vital link to our loved ones.
However, this is little comfort and solace to either side of the divide when elderly parents become infirm and need constant care and attention. Likewise when siblings who live in different countries become seriously ill and one cannot do more than offer verbal or written support save for those couple of weeks when one flies over to visit them. Its inevitable that one suffers from enormous guilt particularly when a remaining sibling carries the load and responsibility for any sick or needy relative. Whilst one cannot attribute blame on those who have left – they are merely trying to do what they deem as best for their nuclear families, yet it is inevitable that some resentment may creep up and fuel some tension however inadvertent.
Sadly, these cases are not isolated and are more the norm in general terms. Such is the world in which we now live. If one imagines the world , even only a century ago, people didn’t have the options we enjoy or access to easy transportation and the ability to relocate at a whim. Surely the family unit must have been stronger and the support from the community would have been a tacit agreement and an absolute. Despite the progress that we purport to enjoy and are privy to, I can’t help feeing that we are lesser off and are lacking in those solid relationships born out of shared challenges and hardships where everyone’s weight was equally pulled and where reciprocation was never questioned or lacking.
